not so easy

it has not been so easy around here lately. especially today. we grieve the loss of our aunt ann, who's birthday is today, along with the loss of little ezekiel (zeke) john. it has been a very hard year, filled with sadness and pain, loss and confusion. james has had one of the hardest years too, which adds to the challenge of getting through each day.

for me, it is so hard to really spend a lot of time thinking about all of it, because i just can't keep it together when i do. i know this goes for everyone who is involved, but it is always a part of our day, so you really cannot think about it.

this fall our community group girls are focusing on scriptures and studies about prayer, so i was going back through my beth moore study from this summer and found some great things to think on:
Psalm 34:17-19
¹⁷ The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
{"God's great deliverance in itself presupposes a trouble from which the person was delivered"}

¹⁸ The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
{"God's closeness to the brokenhearted presupposes a difficulty that broke the heart. The depth of God's aid to the crushed in spirit presupposes the occurrence of something crushing."}

¹⁹ A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all;

God never promised to remove us from human experience. Pain is a part of that. Loss is a part of that. "God's delivering us from every ounce of trial will never develop the relationship that occurs when God shows Himself faithful right in the midst of difficulty, delivering us through it. That's where we come to know Him, to love Him, to appreciate Him."

One of my favorite songs is "You Hold me Now", and the lyrics are so powerful and give such a promise and good picture of what heaven will be like, when we will get to rejoice and be with these sweet souls we have lost.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LX12vnPX60s&feature=related

Until then, we miss and remember them. And we struggle to get through the days and weeks, seeking to find joy and peace, and a new closeness with our Savior.